World Suicide Prevention Day
Today is World Suicide Prevention Day. I make my own stories public for the sake of art and hope. I am not a survivor "per se" but I'm a thinker. For me, I've dealt with moments of intense anxiety, stress, or depression. After a couple years of therapy, this is no longer a daily battle. College is when the thinking really became frequent. So much pressure on myself to be perfect, and to be shameless (i.e. free of sin). But, as Paulo Cohelo wrote in his book, Veronika Decides to Die: A Novel of Redemption,
That gap is when I always remember I have so much to do here. I have love to give.
Another issue was not understanding this idea of life's purpose. I would hear it everywhere especially in church. Pursue the gifts God has given you, find your purpose. I would feel hopeless when my mind says you don't have a purpose, or why can't you figure it out. My therapist cleared this up with one sentence, just breathing is your purpose. In other words, another day on this earth is you fulfilling your purpose by being alive. I carry that with me whenever that idea tries to come back again. It's a battlefield of the mind and through therapy and loving relationships I've learned to keep fighting and keep living.
Some things to help me have been:
- music (uplifting, or a great dance beat to keep moving)
- texting someone I trust
- thinking of my family
- other stories of hope
- knowing my triggers
- sharing my story
In honor of World Suicide Prevention Day, take a moment to be informed of the signs and learn about mental health.
Here are a couple resources:
Don't forget you can always call the National Lifeline when you need someone to listen: